Now I realize the title of this blog creates a sort of hostile reading environment, which is sort of my aim, sort of not…. This is not a droning post about the true meaning of forgiveness and the whole “forgive and forget” cliche mantra crap. We all forgive in our own time, in our own way, and I’m not going to tell anyone how to do it, because in the end, apologies and forgiveness just suck.
Back to my point.
I have noticed over the past couple of months the RIDICULOUS things we apologize for. Some of these apologies are genuine, some are scapegoats to avoid judgment, and some are when you run into an inanimate object and still feel the need to say “I’m sorry!”. It is no mystery that we live in a time where our lives are on display (quite by choice I may add), and we are judged and scrutinized or scrutinize others. We post things to our Facebook walls, Twitter accounts, Instagram profiles. We voice our opinions, we act the way we naturally do and yet we constantly apologize for our quirks, whimsies, and personalities simply because they clash with those around us. How absurd is that!?
How many of us have started a sentence like this: “I’m sorry but ——- is a real bitch.”
You’re not sorry! Don’t act like you are. This is the prime example of the scapegoat method, used by people everywhere to say what they really mean but still show some half-assed compassion.
I think many of you would agree that there have been multiple times when you feel the need to apologize simply because of pressure from friends:
A: “What are you going to do tonight B”
B: “I think I’m just going to stay at home and read A”
A:”Really? That’s lame.”
Maybe I am the only one who enjoys a night in with a good book or movie but why apologize for doing what you really want to do? Maybe we apologize in hopes that if we feel “sorry” about our personal quirks, enjoyments, and personalities then we will still maintain an iota of “coolness” in the eyes of our peers.
In my sincere and honest opinion we need to stop apologizing for who we are. Screw the judgements, screw the weird looks, screw the threat of being a geek, dork, loser or unfit for this hipster generation! The pressure to conform is what you make it out to be, it doesn’t exist if you don’t recognize it. I’m not going to apologize for my love of Harry Potter, crochetting, the smell of old books and all books in general. I’m not going to apologize for my opinions, my attitude, my weight or style (lack there of), nor my beliefs, morals and lifestyle.
Let’s all take a lesson from Phoebe Buffette, embrace your inner weirdness and embrace it in others. If others refuse to accept you as you are, it’s only because they haven’t learned to accept themselves.